The Reality

The reality of being in a relationship with someone in public services.... police officers, firefighters, military...

This weekend John told me that his training officers and sergeants have been trying to set him up to expect failure. They tell him that when he gets married, his wife will make dinner and have it ready at 6pm, when his shift ends, but he'll get a call at 5:45pm and won't end up home until 9pm. And that it makes it tough for relationships. And it will happen more than once per week.

They told him to expect that he'll work holidays, from now until forever. That he can expect that his wife will be giving birth, but he'll be at work.

He had a bruise on his leg from having to hold down a "bad guy". He will swear more, which is inevitable when you spend your days around a bunch of dudes (I know this just from my part time internship at a police department!). He carries his "duty weapon" with him everywhere. And sleeps with it next to his bed (they say this wears off). He will always ask how fast you're driving, when you tell him you're going 8 miles over the speed limit, he tells you to slow down - not only because you can get pulled over, but because he sees too many accidents where people are seriously hurt and could have been less hurt had they been going slower.

My sweet John, he has such an innocence about him, but now I think he's really seeing the world in a different light. But he can love. Oh, can he love. He's the sweetest, most caring man in the entire world (or at least that I've ever been in a relationship with).

The good thing is that he is truly happy in his job, has lots of room for advancement and their schedules are pretty great in that he'll likely have two to three days off at a time.

I'm thankful for the work he does, and I'm so happy to see him enjoy his career. He loves his job and loves helping people.

I'm willing to deal with all of these things, because I love him dearly. The good thing is that I am a pretty independent person, and now that I KNOW and can expect these, well, that's fine. I can always keep myself busy.

It is an interesting road, and I'm excited to continue down it.